marți, 8 iulie 2014

prison break 1

It's all about love, about not judging, about being equal to yourself and to others.
It's all about anger, despair, (broken) trust, scattered dreams, broken families, lonely people.
It's all about rude people, punks, immigrants, outsiders, dreamers, pranksters, firestarters.
It's all about getting out of your comfort zone, about trust, about giving another chance when everyone turned their backs.
It's about learning how to get attached every fucking time, about giving a penny, about (maybe) saving a life.

I am a doctor and I use words like "fuck", "shit", "awesome", "dick head" and other very non catholic/orthodox (depends where you're standing) expressions every day.
I am a "prison doctor". I have fun every day with my guards, with my patients, with my colegues because we love our job.
I am who I choose to be day by day.
My favorite joke is answering to the question : "Where are you, Mada?" "I'm just getting out of jail".
I like to party, I love my job but above all I love my patients. I would do whatever it takes to help them. I am not delusional, I am not Jesus, they cannot be saved but they can be helped. And they need help.

Most of the people don't get it. Why did I choose to work there with the "scumbags" of our society?
Well, for several reasons, one of them would be that I don't think that I am better than they are?
Are you better than them? No, I don't think so. You cheat, you lie, you're greedy, you're arrogant, you're working for money, you're lazy, you're a little bitch in your everyday life, you're racist, you're envious. No one is perfect!
What would you do in their situation? Maybe the same! 
Do you know how it's like to lose everything? You don't! They do!

All this talk about equality, the only thing people really have in common is that they are all going to die!". (Bob Dylan)

So I come as I am in front of them. They try to impress, to seduce, to make me scared ... in the end they are trying to get some emotions from me. 
Now is it good to show emotions to your patients? Maybe, maybe not. 

Addiction is a disease. Addiction is bad and rotten and vicious and...almost impossible to get ride of. It's normal to reject it if you don't try to understand it. 

"Doctor, you will not leave like the other doctors right, after 1 year!" 
"Well, I still have a long road ahead of me, I don't know if this is my final destination :)"
"At least you're honest."

It's impossible to explain the joy of every morning when I have to go to my work = prison is my happy place.
I also work in a private practice. It's not the same. I am stiff, I wear my smile and my pretty clothes, I am polite and professional with my Colgate smile. The difference is that in prison break I am free to express myself! At the practice my patient is my client = master. And I hate it, ooooh how I hate it!
It's like having a split personality : switching again and again and again.

It's my choice. It might not be the good one. I could be wrong, I could be right but I stepped out of my comfort zone a long time ago and I became happy.

I think is important to speak about it because it concerns all of us. Putting people in prison is not a solution. It just makes things worse (imagine a person "without person" and a criminal/rapist/drug dealer in the same cell for some months). Look at the "savages" living on their islands/in their forests : justice for all without extreme measures or with measures socially accepted by all the members of their community. And then look at us : "Uuuu, criminal, he was in jail!". Yes, he was because he has stolen food from the supermarket. How much our politicians are "taking" day by day? 
So, yes, I choose my patients. I'll be there when they wanna go!
You don't know their stories so stop judging and GET HUMAN!

I try to understand my patients trough music :) So I will leave you with my top 11 tracks :

1) Ozzy, junkie 

2) RHCP, Don't forget me         "... I'm the rainbow in your jail cell..."

3) Gogol Bordello, Alcohol

4) Eric Clapton, Cocaine

5) Pink Floyd, Have a cigar 

6) The velvet underground, Heroine

7) Black Sabbath, Sweet Leaf

8) Guns n' roses, Mr Brownstone

9) The rolling stones, Sister Morphine

10) John Lennon, Cold turkey 

11) Cypress Hill, Hits from the bong


Pictures taken this year in Berlin, in March! I fucking love this city! Freedom of speech!

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