prison break 1

It's all about love, about not judging, about being equal to yourself and to others.

It's all about anger, despair, (broken) trust, scattered dreams, broken families, lonely people.

It's all about rude people, punks, immigrants, outsiders, dreamers, pranksters, firestarters.

It's all about getting out of your comfort zone, about trust, about giving another chance when everyone turned their backs.

It's about learning how to get attached every fucking time, about giving a penny, about (maybe) saving a life.

I am a doctor and I use words like "fuck", "shit", "awesome", "dick head" and other very non catholic/orthodox (depends where you're standing) expressions every day.

I am a "prison doctor". I have fun every day with my guards, with my patients, with my colegues because we love our job.

I am who I choose to be day by day.

My favorite joke is answering to the question : "Where are you, Mada?" "I'm just getting out of jail".

I like to party, I love my job but above all I love my patients. I would do whatever it takes to help them. I am not delusional, I am not Jesus, they cannot be saved but they can be helped. And they need help.

Most of the people don't get it. Why did I choose to work there with the "scumbags" of our society?

Well, for several reasons, one of them would be that I don't think that I am better than they are?

Are you better than them? No, I don't think so. You cheat, you lie, you're greedy, you're arrogant, you're working for money, you're lazy, you're a little bitch in your everyday life, you're racist, you're envious. No one is perfect!

What would you do in their situation? Maybe the same! 

Do you know how it's like to lose everything? You don't! They do!

" All this talk about equality, the only thing people really have in common is that they are all going to die!". (Bob Dylan)

So I come as I am in front of them. They try to impress, to seduce, to make me scared ... in the end they are trying to get some emotions from me. 

Now is it good to show emotions to your patients? Maybe, maybe not. 

Addiction is a disease. Addiction is bad and rotten and vicious and...almost impossible to get ride of. It's normal to reject it if you don't try to understand it. 

"Doctor, you will not leave like the other doctors right, after 1 year!" 

"Well, I still have a long road ahead of me, I don't know if this is my final destination :)"

"At least you're honest."

"Always."

It's impossible to explain the joy of every morning when I have to go to my work = prison is my happy place.

I also work in a private practice. It's not the same. I am stiff, I wear my smile and my pretty clothes, I am polite and professional with my Colgate smile. The difference is that in prison break I am free to express myself! At the practice my patient is my client = master. And I hate it, ooooh how I hate it!

It's like having a split personality : switching again and again and again.

It's my choice. It might not be the good one. I could be wrong, I could be right but I stepped out of my comfort zone a long time ago and I became happy.

I think is important to speak about it because it concerns all of us. Putting people in prison is not a solution. It just makes things worse (imagine a person "without person" and a criminal/rapist/drug dealer in the same cell for some months). Look at the "savages" living on their islands/in their forests : justice for all without extreme measures or with measures socially accepted by all the members of their community. And then look at us : "Uuuu, criminal, he was in jail!". Yes, he was because he has stolen food from the supermarket. How much our politicians are "taking" day by day? 

So, yes, I choose my patients. I'll be there when they wanna go!

You don't know their stories so stop judging and GET HUMAN!

I try to understand my patients trough music :) So I will leave you with my top 11 tracks :

1) Ozzy, junkie 

2) RHCP, Don't forget me         "... I'm the rainbow in your jail cell..."

3) Gogol Bordello, Alcohol

4) Eric Clapton, Cocaine

5) Pink Floyd, Have a cigar 

6) The velvet underground, Heroine

7) Black Sabbath, Sweet Leaf

8) Guns n' roses, Mr Brownstone

9) The rolling stones, Sister Morphine

10) John Lennon, Cold turkey 

11) Cypress Hill, Hits from the bong

*

Pictures taken this year in Berlin, in March! I fucking love this city! Freedom of speech!

Contract

This is the part when I say thank you. Thank you to all my friends who are always there for me. You lift me up when I am down (you know it's rare but when I'm down I'm really like 10 feet under). You make me sing, dance, smile, dream. You are  always there. Even if we are scatered all over the world.

Yesterday we celebrated me getting my dream job. And they were warm, happy, optimistic and just...perfect people! I wouldn't change a think about them! So we went and danced the night away. They made me forget some pains and made me a super nova! Hei, I even drunk beer! At 6 AM I was coming back home with M. and the birds were singing. The quiet was soooo perfect. And we stopped, hugged and said : "This moment is perfect!". So I am writing it down in order not to forget it. We know each other for like 6 months but we are...we know each other! He's my brother from another mother. 


" If it's one thing that I've learned over the years is that it only takes one person, one patient, one moment to change your life forever. To change your perspective, color your thinking, to force you to reevaluate everything you think you know. To make you to ask yourself the toughest questions : do you know who you are? do you understand what had happened to you? do you want to live this way?" 

Yes, I want to live the life that I am living. I am happy with my choices. It was a long way 'till here. 

I don't know how long I will stay but I know that I will do my best every day to improove. 

Give and never give up! 

Unafraid givers this is what I love the most!

My first bottle of champgane opened by moi (it was a long process, but nobody was hurt! :)

no death can tear us apart

îmi plac diminețile în care mă trezesc fără ceas, în care timpul parcă stă în loc.
să mă trezesc, să trag storurile, să las lumina să inunde camera, apoi să mă mai bag un pic sub plaplumă.
să citesc, să termin cartea, să încep alta. să imi fie dor de el, ca in fiecare dmineață târzie sau matinală.
să bată a friend in need la ușă, să mâncăm împreună micul dejun gătit de ea. să povestim, să ne hlizim, să facem haz de necaz. apoi să mergem la cinema. sâmbăta a devenit sinonim cu film. singura zi din săptămână în care chiar dispun de timpul meu. apoi să ne uităm la vitrine colorate, să facem schimb de vise, să alungăm pesimismul cât mai departe.

schimb de vreme, schimb de nasturi, schimb de vise și păreri, pături colorate și petecite pe umerii noștrii obosiți dar optimiști. o să trecem și peste asta! o să fie bine!

and I am wondering where your thoughts cross into mine...and I think about you every night but you don`t know it.

m-am obișnuit cu așteptarea.

dar sper să se termine curând cause i miss u.



I believe in justice, God and karma. What goes around it comes around. What you give is what you get.

This is what you`ll get when you mess with us!

karma police...I`ve given all I can but it`s not enough!